Hill Smith Family Update

Like I mentioned, we have been working with Little Dude on the stair ascending and descending, but after that little scare, we stepped it up a bit.

I’m happy to say, Little Dude has successfully gone up and down the upstairs of our house quite a few times within the last few days. We still won’t be taking the gate down anytime soon, but we feel a little more comfortable about him being around stairs.

We also won’t be letting him do the basement steps yet, as they are wooden, unfinished, and that concrete at the bottom would make for a disastrous landing.

We’re getting there though!

In other news, Little Dude appears to have come up with a name for my mom - one of the grandmas. She is “Ama,” and adores it! My guess is that all the grandmas (he has three - the Hubby’s mom, my mom & my mom’s mom) will be christened “Ama,” for now.

Have a great weekend everyone! We have a lot to do around here, so hopefully the weather stays nice, like last night, when we were able to take Little Dude for a walk around the block at about 8/8:30 pm. It was a nice way for him to relax before bed, and a nice way for us to enjoy some fresh air.

I heard from one of my former college roommates, Amy, the other day. This Amy should not be mistaken for the first Amy I lived with briefly, my freshman year, who I kindly characterize as mildly psycho. I can leave that story for another day though….

This Amy, who emailed me, lived with me for our last two years of college, in a tiny house we rented with a different roommate each year. Picture three girls living in a tiny three-bedroom (we were lucky there) house, with an airplane-sized bathroom - it even had the airplane sized metal sink. Seriously. I so wish I could find my pictures I took of that house - I think I took one of that sink, knowing my friends from home would never believe me, but it was the size of a small bar sink, only not as deep.

Anyhow, we lived about a block off of campus - a sweet location, really, except for the issues with parking, since we shared the driveway with the boys living in the house next door. And those boys - rugby players and rowdy as all get-out. Our first week there, we decided we didn’t like them. At all.

They partied until all hours, yelled at each other and they DIDN’T INVITE US! (Okay, in all seriousness, they partied more than any of us, and we had been asked to come over when they met us.)

That first year, our other roommate, Lori, and I, were watching a movie late one night, when there was a huge crash that we could feel throughout the house. Two of the guys were fighting on their back deck (they were having a party again, go figure…), and this argument was pretty intense. We didn’t know if they had slammed something into our house (a car, a person?), or if someone had tried to get in.

We called the cops. And we made fun of them through our kitchen window, as the nice police officers stopped by for a visit.

And then Amy met one of our neighbor boys, Josh, and they began hanging out together. That relationship grew and now, all these years later, they are married. They still live in our college town, but not in our college houses.

Josh had a lot of friends, especially other friends who played rugby. One friend, Patrick Lybert, is the reason Amy was contacting me. Pat lost his life in June, of 2006, in Afghanistan.

Here is how Amy described Pat:

(Pat) always wanted to be in the army.

(His) mom convinced him to go to college first in the hopes he’d outgrow it, so he actually finished college first and then came 9-11. (He) joined shortly after our wedding in 2002.

(Pat was) always a very outgoing guy, told the worst jokes ever, but you’d always end up in tears laughing at the stories he told.

(He) did a year long tour in Fallujah, Iraq - heavy combat. The army MADE him take his two-week leave during that time, so we got to visit with him. We’d get the occasional email or phone call while he was over there, and he always tried to sound like himself and not make anyone worry - but of course we always were (worried).

When he got home though you could tell war had changed him - (he was) quieter, more reserved. He had a lot of pictures and stories, but of course he left a lot of the horrors out. After talking to some of his unit at the funeral, I can’t even imagine what they go through on a daily basis.

Seriously, (he was) the type of guy that would do anything for a friend. After a year back in the States, he volunteered to go with a unit to Afghanistan.

Personally I figured he’d made it through Fallujah, Afghanistan would be “safer.” So wrong!

It’s not talked about as much, but the conditions are so much worse there. They didn’t have as much opportunity for internet or phone access, but the emails we did get didn’t sound as upbeat. The last one we got from him (about a month before he was killed) even used the phrase “if I get home.” He’d NEVER said that in Iraq.

From all accounts from the guys he was with that day, he saved the majority of his unit with his actions. They had been totally ambushed.

He had gotten engaged before he left, and was very close with his family. Just one of the most honest, loyal, down to earth, funny people I have ever met.

A couple of weeks ago, his mom emailed a request.

There is a country singer, Keni Thomas, who is having a contest to see where he should play a concert this summer. Pat’s mom is trying to get him to come to Ladysmith, WI, and play after the motorcycle ride for Pat’s memorial fund, in June.

A little background on Keni Thomas (I didn’t know who he was). He has a couple country CDs out, but he also is a former army ranger. So anyway - as I was forwarding this on, I thought maybe you could post the link on your blog- every vote for Ladysmith will help!

Here’s the link:
http://eventful.com/demand/D0-001-001713333-2

Now, I don’t want to make this post and the comments about personal feelings on the war. This is just a request from a mom who has lost her son, passed on to me by a friend.

If you are able, please put in a vote to help them out.

And Amy and Josh, so glad we lived next to that “crazy rugby house,” so you two could live happily ever after! And, so sorry for the loss of your friend.

(Pat is the one “licking” Amy’s foot, in this 2002 wedding picture. He was an usher at their wedding.)

Have you ever taken a really horrible picture, due to lighting, movement, or some other factor, but then it became one of your favorites, probably due to whatever the mistake it was that you made while taking it?

This is one of those pictures.

Overexposed beyond belief, yet I love it (except, I need to play with the coloring a bit - too much pink)… Little Dude has that look of being just-out-of-reach, and the lighting suits that look.

He was trying to climb the monkey bars at the park, when I snapped this, so part of me was sad that he is growing so quickly and is rapidly moving just outside my reach in so many ways…

Hi - **cough**

How are… **cough, gag, cough** you?

**cough, cough, gag, wheeze, gag, choking noise**

Wow. I feel much better now…

Just kidding! Honest!

After putting Little Dude to bed Friday night, I grabbed the brush and went after Supercat, since we can’t touch him without a cloud of fur rising to take over the room. It is getting tough to breathe, eat and sleep in here, with the constant inhaling of stray cat hairs. And it doesn’t help my allergies at the moment, since I’m one of those wacky cat owners with an allergy to, yep, cats.

Some cats like brushing. And by some, I mean not Supercat. But Friday night he was pretty decent and only tried to detach my arm with his claws once.

The prior picture and this one reveals the second cat I removed from Supercat in one brushing.

Shedding season is definitely here, and I think I know why we’ve had a cat puke issue lately.

I don’t suppose anyone has any patterns for how to make a sweater out of cat hair?

(Edited to add: I’ve been brushing him quite a bit since Friday… Still removing additional cats.)

Just a quick note regarding my last post…

We actually have been working with Little Dude on stairs - the upper ones in our house, since they are carpeted. The basement stairs are all wooden, with concrete at the bottom (unfinished basement). He has no problem going up the stairs, but he still needs a hand to hold as we work on going down the stairs - he wants to walk down, not scoot on his butt.

Thanks everyone! It was pretty scary to see him leaning over the stairs that way…

We had a scare tonight.

We have a gate at the top of our very steep basement stairs. A gate that is fastened to the walls, and only swings one way - away from the stairs.

Shortly after Little Dude began to move, we installed this and other gates - to keep him safe and to give us some peace of mind.

To keep Little Dude from getting into Supercat’s food, I’ve moved Supercat’s dishes to the other side of that gate, on the steps. There is just enough room for Supercat to get under the gate, so he can eat, use his litter and just get away from us when needed.

Normally, I feed Supercat twice a day - once in the morning before Little Dude wakes up and once in the evening, while Little Dude is still in his high chair. I do this so I can leave that gate open, since I seldom have a free hand.

We were a bit off this evening, due to the day Little Dude has had (not an especially great one). I came home just as Little Dude had finished dinner, so I had to sneak in the feeding of Supercat while Uncle R and the Hubby were holding him and had him otherwise occupied.

Or so I thought.

Uncle R didn’t realize I left the gate open while I feed Supercat, and was in the living room. The Hubby had walked into the kitchen to talk to me about something, as he thought Uncle R had Little Dude occupied.

Little Dude headed to the kitchen to join his mommy and daddy, while both of us were looking the other way.

Then, as I turned back to the sink, I caught movement just out of the corner of my eye. At first, it didn’t register, but then I flipped around. And screamed.

Little Dude was perched at the top of the stairs, leaning forward. Just a bit more and… I can’t even think about it.

I got to Little Dude and pulled him away, as the Hubby quickly swung the gate shut.

Uncle R just looked at me in total confusion from the living room.

Crisis averted and Little Dude safely back by his toys in the living room, and I leaned over the sink to finish cleaning out Supercat’s dishes. And cried.

It was nobody’s fault, yet everyone’s fault. I don’t dare think of the what ifs…

Cheryl, over at Red Pens & Diapers, had a scare today, too. And it just goes to show you that it can all happen too quickly. And we both consider ourselves to be pretty observant moms.

As I’ve mentioned before, I spend a portion of my life in the fire service. The other portion of my life is also in health care, but in another capacity.

Although I don’t work directly with these men, I am sure our paths have crossed on the scene of an accident, in training, or in other ways… And I know many people who know at least one of them personally.

Officials Investigate After Fatal Med Flight Helicopter Crash - Three Crew Members Killed

The medical community and the emergency services community is a relatively small one, when you think about it. This hits both areas, and a lot of people are stunned and saddened by this tragedy.

My condolences to the families, friends, coworkers and students of these three men.

I’m kind-of late in writing my true mother’s day post, but with the exception of posting a few photos of Little Dude, I banned myself from sitting at the computer too much this weekend. It was a bit of a gift to myself - the gift of time. I meant to write something yesterday, but then I wanted to share the pacifier-free living, which is still going strong, by the way - Little Dude wants nothing to do with them.

Mommy’s Day. First, happy mother’s day to all of my mom friends, mom blog-lurkers, and anyone else passing through. If you have been a mom, or just acted as a caregiver to a child - this day is for you.

Second, to all of the people out there who dream of being a mom and are struggling, I know how tough this day is for you. I’m sorry, and my thoughts and prayers are with all of you. Although we are blessed to have Little Dude in our lives now, I remember the tears and frustration prior to having him.

I found out I was pregnant a week after mother’s day, two years ago. The week before that BFP (”big fat positive,” for those of you who have never entered the baby-craving Web world), I silently cried all through church, with tears escaping down my cheeks at various times, as the message focused on moms. And when I got home, I sobbed my eyes out. My friend A, and I exchanged our frustration and depression, at our inabilities to become moms, on a regular basis, via email.

Happily, she and I have both been blessed with beautiful and healthy little boys. Me, last year. Her, earlier this year.

But back to that year, two years ago… When I was in church that day, one of the ladies who attends our church, Mrs. P, turned to me at one point, and mentioned that “maybe next year” I would be celebrating with the rest of the moms. Mrs. P had no idea the struggles we had been through and how hopeless that idea seemed to me.

I adore Mrs. P, and she was my parent’s neighbor for years and years, while my sisters and I were growing up, but I was just a bit upset at the time, as to me, when people said things along the lines of, “so, when are you going to have a baby?” or, “hopefully, you will be a mom someday,” it tended to rub salt in that wound. I had learned to just say, “we aren’t having children,” to most people, as it avoided the talk of getting pregnant and such.

However, like I’ve told Mrs. P, I now think of her as kind-of my angel - sent to me to maybe let me know that all of that was about to change. Just a day short of one week after mother’s day, I took the test. And it was positive.

In fact, it turned positive before I had even had a chance to set it down to wait. I darn near fell off the toilet, to be blunt, when I saw it change!

The funny thing was, although things were off a bit, I didn’t suspect I was pregnant at the time. I was taking the test for my own peace of mind, just to rule out the possibility that I was pregnant, as I was scheduled to begin taking a new medication, which I couldn’t take if I was pregnant. And I just wanted to be safe.

I’m so glad I tested.

So, there is my mommy’s day story. It has been a whirlwind two years since then, and I’m so happy to celebrate today as my second official year as a mommy. And overall, it has been a great day!

Once again, to all of you moms, grandmas or other caregivers, happy mother’s day. Thank you for making the difference in the life of a child.

To all of you who struggle with this holiday, for whatever reason, I hope tomorrow brings a new day, new hopes and a sense of peace.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Now for the personal stuff –

To my mom - Thank you for all you do, have done, and will do. Thank you, especially, for not killing me during the teen years. Not that you would, as I was such a perfect child, but I’m just sayin’… I’m so thrilled Little Dude has you as a grandma, and that you are able to spend two days a week caring for him! You are building a bond with him that he will always remember.

To my mother-in-law - Thank you for raising the Hubby to be the man he is today (and teaching him how to cook, or we all might starve!!!!!), and for accepting me into your family with love and open arms. I am so thankful you are here and that you adore Little Dude. It warms my heart to see him with you! I wish we could all be up at the hospital with you on Tuesday, but will stay connected via phone. We hope and pray all goes well, and that you have a speedy recovery!

To my grandmother - Thank you for still seeing me as grandma’s girl, for loving to talk with me, for always looking out for me and for being on the end of the phone, or there with a hug, when it felt like I didn’t have a friend and was fighting disagreeing with my parents. (Rest of the world - you didn’t see that part. I was a perfect child. Right mom?) Thank you for adoring Little Dude, and listening to me blather on about how perfect he truly is - just like me as a child, right?

To my Aunt Char - Thank you for taking me into your home as a nanny to your eldest child (who is about to graduate from high school, holy cow!), when mom and I needed a bit of a break from each other during those late teen years (again, I was perfect, so I don’t know why that was…). Thank you for being there and letting me play mom to Maggie. Just remember, when she is being difficult - I didn’t teach her that!

To my sisters - Happy mom’s day to you both. To the older sister, Mrs V - Thanks for being there with years of advice, including some of those truly embarrassing questions you answered while you were in college, of which I will not share the details on here, for fear of ruining my fairly family-friendly blog. J - You are mom to your cats, and have played mom for some of the past boyfriends, so we’ll let you share in it, too. **giggle**

And to my friend A - In the words of a very old ad campaign (for cigarettes, of all things not family-friendly, I believe), “We’ve come a long way, baby!” Happy 1st Mom’s Day!

Happy Mother’s Day, everyone!

Okay, so not really… Just a cute shot of Little Dude peeking at me through the back of our kitchen chairs…

We have some more teeth entering our household, and Little Dude’s gums have been pretty red and swollen, with some minor bleeding on occasion. The lower cuspids are slowly, and obviously in an uncomfortable fashion, arriving in Little Dude’s mouth.

Over the past few weeks, we’ve seen the upper ones coming in as well, so there is a lot of drool and gnawing on everything occurring in our household. We can’t complain, though, as although Little Dude has been a bit more moody, he has handled teething like a champ, for the most part.

These latest teeth have had another side-effect, though.

The nukster (pacifier) is no longer a good friend to Little Dude. (By the way, we use the term nuk/nukster, as I can’t stand the terms “paci” or “binky.” Binky sounds like a scary clown, if you ask me, and paci is just yuck. I’ve heard other terms, too, but most of them drive me nuts, because I’m weird about words, that way. Little Dude doesn’t use the nuk-brand of pacifiers, but the name stuck. And yes, Little Dude has the book, “Binky,” and loves having it read to him.)

Little Dude has had the nuk for most of his life. It was my lifesaver when I nursed, after he began to accept it, as it gave me a much-needed break from hour-long feeding sessions, when he would comfort nurse. There were days I felt like I couldn’t be more than a foot away from him at all times, and the nuk gave me a few minutes here and there.

The nuk helped out the Hubby, my mom and my neighbor, when I went back to work, as by then, he had transitioned to using the nuk as a comfort device when I was unavailable.

Between his “silky” (blanket with satin-type backing) and the nuk, Little Dude is able to feel like he can handle anything.

It might be coming to a natural end, though. Not for the silky, but for the nuk.

Little Dude has refused the nuk at bedtime the last two nights, and rejected it again for nap-time, today. He did take it for nap-time yesterday, but that was the only time he really wanted it. Otherwise, it has been spit out or tossed away.

The Hubby and I just talked about it, and we aren’t going to offer it the rest of the weekend. If he reaches for one (we try to keep them all clean and in one place, but we’ve been surprised at where they show up) or indicates he would want one (he knows where they are kept), we aren’t going to turn him down. But it has to be his call.

If he makes it through the weekend without one, I’m guessing we’ve lost our little nukster face.

I’m happy for him, but also sad… I always think of “Maggie Simpson” and giggle when I see Little Dude so intent on that nuk. Also, it has been in our bag of tricks for calming Little Dude for so long, I feel like we are entering a foreign land without it.

Along with that transition, we are transitioning away from bottles as well. We’ve only used them for formula, ever, except for when we first introduced him to some very watered-down juice, so we never worried about if that would be a difficult transition.

He is successfully using a sippy cup or straw cup for formula during the day, so we will probably begin doing the same in the morning. The night bottle will be the last one to go, and we may wait until we get the all-clear from our physician on reducing formula, or stopping it altogether.

He will be retested on the severity of his dairy protein allergy shortly after his 18-month appointment, or so we have discussed.

I see the last remnants of the baby I had in this household slipping away, right now… My heart is torn on rejoicing in his growth and achievements, and looking ahead to all the other things he will accomplish, or breaking as I see this part of life slipping away…

(And, yes - Little Dude actually had both of these “nuks” at one point, as Mam has been the preferred brand around here since he was about six months old.)